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One of the main differences in Events Psychology is that instead of dealing with “a terrible childhood”, “my abuse father”, “everything just feels hopeless”, we focus on one specific memory at a time, and within that memory, we work on the one moment when everything changed inside the client. This makes Events Psychology extremely quick and effective.
Let’s take a look at what a session could look like.
The Session
Some people know exactly what issue they want to work on. Let us take the example of a woman, let’s call her Sheila, who felt utterly powerless because she was abused from the time she was very young and thus has never learned that she is an individual in her own right – that her body and her live are her own. She felt unable to do what she really wanted to do, unable to assert herself, and she was always looking to others for answers and confirmation of what to do with herself and her life. Deep inside, she wanted to do live a different kind of life; she just wanted to be herself. But she felt deflated and hopeless – like life had been too hard and she would never recover.
When Sheila called for a session, I asked her about a specific time when somebody made her feel powerless. She said “Oh that is just how it always was. My father was always overpowering me and I could never get away. If I tried to resist or run away, he just became even meaner so it was safer to just leave my body and give up”.
Instead of talking about her horrible childhood and how she felt, I asked her for a specific memory, maybe of the first time her father attacked her. She thought about it for a while and started talking about a specific incident when her father had abused her. As soon as she started talking, I could fear the change in her voice and asked her how stressed she felt, on a scale from zero to ten. She started crying and whispered “ten”. I asked her where she felt the pain in her body and she told me it was in her heart. I asked her to gently put her hands on her heart and simply tell the energy to “soften and flow” – the standard instruction we use in EmoTrance. We took some releasing the pain in her heart until she felt better and able to continue the story. Every time she felt stressed, we would stop and use EmoTrance to release the pain and fear until she felt calm and clear.
I asked for that specific moment when something shifted inside her body. There was one moment when her father walked into the room and the way he looked at her made something click inside her and everything turned to ice and she thought “Oh, my god, he’s going to hurt me, I know he is. I can’t stop him, mom is not home and there is no one to help me. I’m going to die. It’s hopeless, I can’t get away.” We call these beliefs “meta-comments”.
This is the moment we are looking for – this is when Sheila’s life changed forever. This is the Event.
Sheila said that everything turned to ice inside her, so I asked her where exactly she felt that in her body because this is where the energetic damage occurred. I noted those accompanying thoughts and ask her if she could understand why she would have thought that. She said of course, she did. Who wouldn’t have thoughts that way!
This step is incredibly important because it brings a deep level of understanding and compassion for the little kid who went through this and from then on developed a whole new set of standards for life.
At this point in the session, we did a “memory enrichment” where we create a new version of the story. A version that not only takes away the trauma but one that actually enriches her life so that it becomes an empowering, happy memory!
Sheila chose to step into this scene as her current adult self, with her mom and 4 fully armed Marines for backup. We started the story at the point when the father came into the room. Sheila’s mom now stepped in and took one look at him, grabbed him by the arm and told him to come into the living room. He looked surprised and confused and not a little embarrassed. We followed them into the living room and watched her mother talk very sternly to her father, telling him that she saw what he was up to and to get the hell out of the house and not come back until he has undergone some serious therapy.
While this was happening, adult Sheila had a flash of her father being abused by his own father when he was a very young boy and she felt a flood of compassion rushing through her. She could suddenly understand how her father could do such terrible things to her and her whole world shifted again.
We continued the memory enrichment. The mother went back into little Sheila’s room and put her arms around her and held her tight. She relaxed into her mother’s embrace and she felt a warm, tingly feeling in her heart and just knew that she is safe and that there would always be someone to protect her. She had the thought that her mom was more powerful than anyone else and the world is a safe place.
This is what we call a Threshold Shift. Sheila actually felt this in her own body as her energy system reacted to this new scenario and accepted it as truth.
We went back over the old story and the old beliefs, the meta-comments that were created during the initial event to see if they still held an emotional charge. They did not. Instead she felt uplifted and calm in her mind. She had a deep level of understanding of her father now and she had released the energy block that was created so many years ago. (If the original story or meta-comments had still caused her stress, we would have used EmoTrance to help the energy flow again, and we would have continued to modify the enriched memory until the Threshold Shift was reached.
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